Dear Customer,

Aloha ! And sorry for that you can`t be a customer here at all, because a) we have nothing to declare and b) we have nothing to give away which would fit your beautiful language - except our total free downloadable song (click to download) and our digital sublimationprint-designs for our ID-Tourism T-Shirt and our ID-Tourism Mug. And a special service for the fellow traveler :

If you ever come to Germany let our travel guides provide you with a splendid and unique experience : Be whoever you want to be, do whatever you have dreamed to do in whatever shady situation you prefer - if you can stand to sit in a cell with 3 hairy smiling vendors who doesn`t seem to leave it at a handshake (click here).

You like to be a kafkaesque citizen, chased by sinister staff ? O.K., you just have to go through any US Flight Terminal to have that, but you get the point, right? You like to be touched by nasty women at spots even your wife refuses to touch you? Buying a ticket will help here, too. You like to be an agent? Be one, this is what ID-Tourism is all about. Go out and do it. Identity-Traveling can be fun! But don`t get caug...ähm...get involved in any sort of illegal behavior, of course. We didn`t. And we haven`t written it down. In English.

Bureau of Foreign Affairs
ID-Tourism Travel Agency
Est. 1973

I agree that I don`t understand a single bit - except the above mentioned, because everything else is fucking german. Beside that I swear that I never will take any picture or part from this site to share it with others, fuck, yeah! Except the link, of course. With my signature in mind I agree to the following terms :

§1. If I`m a lawyer trying to sue you : Fuck me !
§2. If I`m a left-, rightwing or veggie extremist trying to fuck you :       You sue me ! (With your pointed sticks)
§3. If I`m not able to get your message or just under the age of 18 :       Good riddance - and ... bwahahahahha ??!?

All rights reversed.
No part of this website should be distributed in any shape w/out prior written permission.